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[Guest arabaliozian]

CONFESSIONS OF A FORMER FASCIST*************************************** Like most Armenians who had an Armenian education, I was brought up to be a patriotic little fascist bastard. Which is why I can recognize a fascist when I see one. All I have to do is recall myself when young and brainwashed.I know now that all nations produce their share of chauvinist fanatics because all nations have at their disposal vulnerable young minds whose critical faculties have not yet been awakened; and even when they grow up, most of these poor benighted souls remain so immersed in their own prejudices that they are incapable of recognizing reflections of themselves in the "enemy" camp. These fascists are so sure of the absolute validity of their beliefs that they are willing to kill and die for them. In that sense, an Armenian and a Turkish or Azeri fascist share more things in common with one another than with their own fellow countrymen who are convinced such things as national superiority and ethnocentrism are at the very root of wars and massacres, and to promote them in the name of this or that noble cause is the quintessence of charlatanism. TOP DOGS AND UNDERDOGS**********************************The ambition of every underdog is to be a top dog. Underdogs may identify with fellow underdogs and they may even sympathize with them; but when it comes to actions (as opposed to words) their number one priority is to be top dogs. Which is why all revolutions accomplish is to replace one gang of rascals with another. What I have said so far refers to history and reality and not to individual exceptions to this general rule. When we think and we act we base ourselves not on exceptions but on rules; and as Italians are fond of saying: the function of an exception is not to refute a rule but to confirm it. Wednesday, October 16, 2002******************************I have at no time experienced Turkish ferocity on my own skin – I have read about it but never experienced it. But I have come close – #### close: I have experienced Armenian hostility. And what has been my worst transgression? Trying to share my understanding.*About convictions, certainties, and faith: If the braying of an ass is louder than the whisper of a wise man, does that mean the ass knows better?*Fools and fanatics read not to learn but to justify their hatred.*In 1915 we were massacred as a nation: why can't we behave as one today?*We are so used to modifying history with our own brand of nationalist propaganda that any assessment that may be remotely objective is branded as pro-Turkish.*To hate those who have injured us: what could be easier?To love them: what could be more difficult?But what if both hate and love are, in this context, irrelevant and what matters is taking care of business by doing what must be done? MOUSETRAP*********************It is a mistake to use the mind as if it were a disposable mousetrap good for catching only one mouse and in the process of catching it to kill it. An idea is not a dead end; it is a living organism in an endless chain reaction of assertion, contradiction and synthesis. In saying this I am saying nothing new, only paraphrasing the teachings of philosophers from Socrates and Plato to Hegel and Marx. What killed Bolshevism was Bolsheviks who appear to have forgotten or ignored Marx’s dialectic and his assertion "I am not a Marxist." And what prevents us from solving our problems and moving forward is our obsession with received platitudes such as first nation to accept Christianity andfirst nation to suffer a genocide in the 20th century. THE LEVANT *****************The Levant has not been kind to Armenians. It has made them mercenary, which means more materialistic, unprincipled, cunning, and philistine. I am not saying all Armenians from the Middle East are crooks. What I am talking about here is the dominant mentality, which no doubt, like every dominant mentality, has produced resistance, and sometimes even active opposition in a non-representative minority. *To say that the Levant has done more harm than good to our ethos is to state the obvious. Think of our medieval architecture, liturgical music, and illuminated manuscripts: they are quintessential manifestations of our voki and it is this very voki that the Levant negates. *"Money is rust and dirt in the hands; to taste it is like eating one’s own flesh," Khachatur Abovian tells us. And more: "Man must sell his soul in order to covet money." *I see no connection between our authentic self and the Levantine mentality. They are both Armenian only in the sense that Bach’s music and the Nazi ideology are German – but the one might as well be a contradiction of the other. UNPOPULAR OPINIONS***************************In 1998 I published a book titled UNPOPULAR OPINIONS in which I raised a few questions about our present situation, among them the following two: "If the threat of annihilation in 1915 could not unite us, what can? If we remain as divided today as we were then, what have we learned?" In the acknowledgments of that book I mentioned the names of 25 friends whose encouragement and support I enjoyed and to whom I dedicated the book. On rereading these names I notice that nearly half of them are no longer on speaking terms with me. It can truly be said of Armenian friends: Easy come, easier go. If keeping Armenian friends means subscribing to anti-Semitism, racism, fascism, Stalinism and similar aberrations, I suppose I shall die friendless.