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JazzVaz

Hazarapet
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Everything posted by JazzVaz

  1. How To Beat A Speeding Ticket. A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange: Officer: May I see your driver's license? Driver: I don't have one. It was revoked when I got my 5th DWI. Officer: May I see the registration for this vehicle? Driver: It's not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen? Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the registration in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there. Officer: There's a gun in the glove box? Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk. Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!? Driver: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the officer immediately called his Captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the Captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation: Captain: Sir, can I see your license? Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid. Captain: Whose car is this? Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the registration. The driver owned the car. Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it? Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it. Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box. Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it. Driver: No problem. Trunk is opened; no body. Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk. Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!
  2. JazzVaz

    Анекдоты

    После тяжёлого дня Штирлиц с Мюллером зашли в бар и трахнули баварского пивца. На следующий день затраханный баварский певец скончался...
  3. JazzVaz

    Анекдоты

    На балу компания ведет светскую беседу. Разговор зашел о птицах. И тут встревает поручик Ржевский: - Кстати, господа, о пернатых. У бегемота ВОООТ ТАКАЯ задница. И ни одного перышка.
  4. But for the next time, show a little more skin.. More skin I see, happyer I become.. so ..
  5. Super! Girls I wanna date every single one of you!!!!
  6. Покайфу слова.. аж прямо зажыгает. Если любовник(ца) то там обяснять нечего не нужно, там и так все ясно. Bесь культур мультур ставиш в сторонку, разбигаешся и прыгаеш!! Just take it, and do it! do it !!
  7. Avshar, ani eherog otakh (I'll kill you) your soul is mine I am registered under JazzVazz
  8. Вот тот кто тебе это сказал, пускай пойдет себе голову об стенку ударит. Ты там не задержывай, по кругу пускай...
  9. Друг, помоему ты уже не только под... а под целыми магическими грибочками ...
  10. нуну, смотри не переторчи
  11. Нет, я b@nik (истенный) Ереванци. Ну а Ganjaman, это Ямайская тема. Они план называют ганджа.
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