smally Posted August 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2006 -Вы, мужики, такие грубые! Вам нужен только секс! А нам, девушкам, нужно внимание... -Внимание, сейчас будет секс! Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2006 - здравствуйте. а где поезд на одессу? - уже ушел. - вот здрасте а куда? :lol: Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2006 Преподаватель: - Ваша фамилия? Студент: - Иванов (улыбается). - Чему вы улыбаетесь? - спрашивает профессор. - Доволен, что хорошо ответил на первый вопрос. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 8, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 8, 2006 One day, Jimmy Joe was walking down Main Street when he saw his buddy Bubba driving a brand new pickup. Bubba pulled up to him with a wide grin. "Bubba, where'd you get that truck?!?" "Bobby Sue gave it to me" Bubba replied. "She gave it to you? I knew she was kinda sweet on ya, but a new truck?" "Well, Jimmy Joe, let me tell you what happened. We were driving out on County Road 6, in the middle of nowhere. Bobby Sue pulled off the road, put the truck in 4-wheel drive, and headed into the woods. She parked the truck, got out,threw off all her clothes and said, 'Bubba, take whatever you want'. So I took the truck!" "Bubba, you're a smart man!. Them clothes woulda never fit you!" Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Hawk Posted August 11, 2006 Report Share Posted August 11, 2006 (edited) японцы угадайте как я отгадал (кстати они рассматривают в мобильнике новую серию Покемона ) Edited August 11, 2006 by Hawk Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 12, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 12, 2006 японцы угадайте как я отгадал (кстати они рассматривают в мобильнике новую серию Покемона ) Ну допустим японцы - узнал, а как догадался - что рассматривают? Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Vardan Posted August 13, 2006 Report Share Posted August 13, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
Vardan Posted August 13, 2006 Report Share Posted August 13, 2006 Before _____ After _____ After After _________ Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 This's super. Read it! Marriage - Part I Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?" His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night .whether you're here or not." (DAMN SHE'S GOOD!) ************************************ Marriage (Part II) Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40th wedding anniversary! The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: "Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever " "Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstone that reads: "Here Lies My Husband - Stiff At Last" (HE ASKED FOR IT!) ****************************** Marriage! (Part III) Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfast table. Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bed either," and storms out of the house. After some time, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amends and rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and the irritated husband says, "What took you so long to answer the phone?" She says, "I was in bed." "In bed this early, doing what?" "Getting a second opinion!" (YEP, HE HAD THAT ONE COMING, TOO!) ****************************************** Marriage (Part IV) A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is so proud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother of Six" in spite of her objections. One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to go home and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well. He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?' His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shouts right back, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four." (RIGHT ON, LADY!) ************************************** Marriage (Part V) The Silent Treatment A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 am for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, "Please wake me at 5:00 am" He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up." Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. Quote Link to post Share on other sites
karik Posted August 16, 2006 Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 [attachmentid=30216]Smalli джан, мне что-то понравилось решил в твой мир скинуть Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Карен, а ведь очень красиво Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Ujegh kami : Quote Link to post Share on other sites
smally Posted August 16, 2006 Author Report Share Posted August 16, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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smally Posted September 23, 2006 Author Report Share Posted September 23, 2006 Quote Link to post Share on other sites
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